Is The Goal To Be Happy?

I grew up believing happiness was the goal. If you’re happy then life is good and that is how you’ll know you are living your best life. What could be a better indicator right?

 It wasn’t until I wasn’t happy for a while, that I started to question this. I watched a video of someone saying that happiness can’t be the goal if it is one of many emotions. That we need to have all the emotions because that’s what makes us human. So, I started contemplating, what was the goal then? 

As someone who struggled with identifying emotions other than the basics - happy, depressed or angry – I looked back at the constant feeling that was part of my life. The feeling that stood firm through everything. Faith.

Whether things felt good or bad, my faith was unwavering. So, what did that mean? 

I often get told I’m very deep, and rightfully so, because the questions that came after that were intense. These are a few things I sat with:

• What is my purpose on this earth?
• How am I supposed to feel?
• What is the secret to calm?
• Why was I placed on this earth?
• How do I know if I’ve succeeded?

The list goes on.

After weeks of conversations with myself, I concluded that the emotional goal I was after, was contentment. The state of being satisfied and pleased, accepting my current situation and finding peace in the present. Because when you are content, you have accepted what is, whether it is good or bad. You’re grateful for the outcome, whether it is good or bad. And you’re not bound to one direction. You can be content and still work on big goals. You can be content and sad and disappointed at the same time. When you are content, you are simply at peace.

So how do you find contentment?

You accept your life for what it is. You accept any situation without dramatizing it.  You seek what adds value to your life. You easily let go of what doesn’t add value to your life. You begin building a life in alignment with your values.

Two books have helped me on this journey: The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, by Robin Sharma; and The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle. One about simplicity and life alignment, the other about presence. I highly recommend. 

What’s important to remember is that contentment doesn’t mean settling. It doesn’t mean you don’t go after your dreams or goals or continuously improve. It simply means you accept the circumstances of every stage and continuously move forward despite it. 

Don’t confuse satisfaction with your worth. You are and will always be worthy of everything you dream of. Everyone’s success looks different, so don’t let comparison rob you of what a successful life looks like to you.

I hope you find the inner peace that accompanies contentment.

I hope you find what you’re looking for.